makes me wonder why i cant say it straight.:))

It has days since I started to take this seriously.

I always hate it when things start to blow into pieces or suddenly vanish without me actually understanding what really happened. I hate it when people don’t talk to me about whatever it is that needs to be talked about and when you ask them, they say everything’s fine but when you turn your back, ayan naa. I hate it when everyone knows your problem except you. I also hate people who don’t understand.
I should stop. I bet you’re asking what my problem is. Well, you all know what it is. Im not gonna say it.
Well its not really a problem because I know it isn’t. IT made it a problem. I know that I have been setting priorities. Sad to say, there are more things I have to prioritize rather than IT. What I didn’t understand was that I expected IT, of all ITS, to understand. Its funny rin kasi kahit si ate nagsasabi na hindi siya magandang influence sa akin kasi hindi maganda ang personality niya para sa akin. and yet, I didn’t mind that because I believed that IT will change. And ive hoped that IT will change so that I can prove that IT is not who they think IT really is.
Ive been trying, but I was only fooling myself. Ang saya. She already told me a long long time ago to stop being with IT if im growing uncomfortable of her and that I cant keep up. But I didn’t do that. Kasi nga, I still believed. Pero when I was going through rough roads, dun ko nasabi na I should stop. It was then that I concluded that I had to take a huge load on me.
Helloo. IT has to know that number one: my world doesn’t revolve around IT or any other person. Number two: IT is not the only one who gets busy and do things. And number three: I don’t like to be busy. Why the eff would IT think that im faking my business?? I mean, IT knows how many things ive involved myself in.
Dati hindi ko to ginatouch on kasi alam ko it will pass. Pero I think ayaw niya na. and what I hate most is what IT’s been doing. Alam niyo ung as if wala ka talagamg value sa kanya? Makes me wonder if the thing itself is genuine…
But at the end of the day, I won’t bother myself. Why? It’s because even though I know this is a serious matter, I got more things to worry about. I got my grades to worry about because I have a goal and I am failing miserably. I got debate, which really pressures me, but I like it.
And you know what, I should have followed her advice a long time ago. Kasi kung matagal ko nang sinimulan iyon, matagal na sana akong Masaya.



She’s right. Youre not worth it.

on intriga and exes...

intriga.

intriga.

intriga.



nakakaineeessss. haha. pero ndi ko xa maiwas iwasan. maygaaahhd. it sucks. kawawa rin xa kasi i think na he's super annoyed. malapit na xang manipa. pero, nabreak ang mood nang tumawa ako. (EH SINO BA NAMAN ANG HINDI MATATAWA KUNG SABIHAN KA NA SIPAIN KA PERO ANG GINAWA KAY NAGMAKE NG FIST?? paluie talaga na tao, kahit kailan.)


what seems isnt what is. or is it.?


weeelll. hahaha.


and speaking of intriga, kawawa mxado kuya ko. hehe kasi, kanina, pumunta kami ng kuya ko at gf niya sa may alfresco sa damosa. tapos, biglang ang EX gf.lumabas out of friggin nowhere. gaaaahd. (this time, i can hear sound effects. un tipong naririnig mo sa Jaws.)



kuya:hala ka, nagunsa ka diri?



ex:oh hi!! ang bait ni god noh.:))



ako:*turns back, sighs.*



ex:oh, she's the one?*looks, no, glares at my kuya's gf*



kuya:ay oo, si ____ pala.



ex:oh hi!! ay san ka? pahatid ako ng citi hardware be.

(hindi naman siya masyadong makapal ano.)



sa car...



ex:ano ka man! sayang ang aking 80,000 dito kung hindi ko naman ito ginagamit!

(background: nung sila pa, they purchased the car. when they broke up, nasa amin ang car kasi we payed for the rest. and nasa 300000 ang car. plus repairs. plus binayaran na ata xa.)



ako:*pinipilit na sirain ang rubiks cube sa inis.*

(alam niyo ba na ang office niya ay nasa may tugbok?? at kami naman ay nasa may matina na banda. para siyang nccc centro hanggang sa UIC bajada. tapos sabi niya seconds. o sige... 30 mins times 60 secs. plus traffic. seconds nga lang. seconds.)



at dahil doon, nalate kami papunta sa addu college. at minalas na kmi the whooolle day. ang galing galing ng world, bai. as in.



and speaking of malas, putul putol ang smart bro prepaid. kaya wag nio itong iconsider. kasi its like... dial up. stupeeid.




oo. tama. mapapadalas na ang mga blog. kasi magpapanata na ako bai. hehehehe.